So close, but yet so dang stinking far
It turned out better later anyway.

3-4-99, 10:49 am

Youth group last night. Thom, Laurel and I skipped out on the high school youth group (it was "low key night") and went down to the pier, and got three photo booth pictures taken. :D More flirting. Alot of flirting.

We joined up with Steve, who said he didn't remember me at middle school youth group (I was right up front, leading singing) and I said in mock anguish "I'm so unnoticeable! I'm so invisible!"

Thom glanced sideways at me. "You're noticeable."

'Course, then I was blushing and grinning and very glad it was dark so Laurel and Steve couldn't see me acting like a giddy moron. ^_^ Much flirting, glancing. Underlying.

I drove him home, and we blabbed. We discussed scents, how you never smell like anything to yourself, but other people smell "you." He took my hand and smelled it. "Do you use perfume?" He asked.


"You smell good. I don't know what it is, but I recognize it. It's a good smell.."

I smelled his hand. "You smell good too. A good smell."

He smelled his own hand. "I smell like skin to me."

"No, no, you smell good. A very nice smell. I noticed it in the photo booth, even." We sat grinning for a minute.

(He also told me he liked my voice, which I found hilariously funny, because I think I have the most grating voice known to mankind. Annoying anyway. :)

I pulled up in his driveway and somehow got around to telling him my strange dream (that he kissed me in the church.)

"Hmm," he said.

"What?" I said. "What? What?" (I'm completely persistant when people won't tell me something. Right, Laurel? ^^)

"No, no," he said.

I grabbed his arm. "You're telling me! I won't let you out of the car until you tell me!"

"It's embarressing," he said.

"Oh, you think I had an easy time telling you my dream?"

"Yeah, but yours was just a dream, and mine's a thought."

A blush from me. "Hey, it wasn't that bad!" Grin.

"It's difficult to put into words," he said. Silence. He bit his lip.

I got his drift. "It's all a matter of.. choice," I said.

Silence, excruciating silence. And heavy, heavy air. Hanging between us.

His sister came out of their house and said that he had to come in, so we looked at each other. "For another time," he said. And we shook hands jokingly.

"Bye Courtney-chan," he said. "Sweet dreams." And he left.

He invited me to the next high school dance... which I will go to. And to the dance club this Saturday. And we have swing class tonight....... Killer diller..... :D

11:06 am

I am a squishette.

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